hai assalamualaikum everyone.

its been a veeeeeeeeery loooonnggg time since my last post *insert laugh emoji*
i know i know. i just lack of motivations to write. <------ one of the reasons why mum said that im the type to study halfway. you know tahi tahi ayam? <---- and one of the reasons why i only studied halfway thru on chinese, japanese and korean language.. ha ha ha

but i can speak korean tho. a bit :p and im proud of it *wink*
anyways the real reason that im actually writing this is because i wanted to talk about my cgpa. yep.
i screwed up real bad. and i felt bad for screwing up.. ofc id feel bad! i mean, who wont? i know most of yall in school will feel like "nah thats normal". yes i know. i feel that too and i used to be like you guys. tomorrow's exam day and im here watching kpop, learning new dances because its school!!!

but here in college, everything is different. very different. you have to compete in almost everything, and this is where i um whats the suitable word to insert here eyyyy ok i know. i fcked up. yep. my father advised me before entering college that i should be studying harder so that things wont happen again. what is? me not getting straight As for PMR (cried like hell that day lol), not getting straight As for SPM (was cool bcs i wasnt expecting anything) (expectation kills) and this, i ruined my cgpa..

and i had the nerve nOT TO TELL MY PARENTS ABOUT IT. omgggg forgive me mother for i have sinned T^T but i didnt want to disappoint you guys with my results because i believed that i still have my 2nd semester and i wanted to prove that i can do better.

but i was wrong :( i still fked up my cgpa and thats the end of it. on the day of the upu results, i sent a text and 15 mins later, i got a text back, saying that i didnt get any place in the upu. i was sad, devastated, idk. but definitely not that sad. with that kind of pointer, heck ofc i knew where id belong. mum asked me how did it go, and i couldnt help but to tell her the truth. and yes, she was speechless. no words came out. and dad's reaction wins, "that's it?" and mum asked me whats my pointer andddddd there you go, spill the tea a l r e a d y. i told her only few and she said "no wonder you dont have any place in upu". i know mum, cant help but to be a disappointment.

ohh how i missed my standard 5 life.. where i succeeded in almost everything. sports? you name it. academics? heck i was the top in the whole batch. gold times.. if only i have the power to turn back time, thats it. i just need some source of powerful magic or magician that can help to turn back time and i can make things right. mum and dad would be proud of me.

yada yada enuf with the rants. gotta go now. adios!